So I'm sitting here browsing the web while sipping a few cans (on my 2nd, more possibly to follow). Not with any view to get drunk but just to mellow out at my own pace while I casually browse facebook, youtube, tech blogs and whatever else takes my fancy. As I'm doing this I see quite attractive girls from my past (who've thankfully not befriended me) post status updates and photos as I'm passively letting my news feed wash over me.
This brings me the thoughts that I'm altogether disillusioned by the whole dating scene. Mostly, I suspect, because I am woefully ill equipped for these sort of things. I know people who thrive at the game like it's a natural extension of their personality, or at least put enough effort into learning it as they would a sport or profession. Myself? call it a flaw if you will but I'm a passive rather then an active dater or at least any time I've tried to be an active dater I've failed miserably. Composing sonnets? Comparing the object of my affections lips to red roses and their eyes to endless blue oceans that I could get lost in eternity? Do I object to such language? No I find it wonderfully descriptive, but I'm not so bold as to profess my affections like such in public. It'd make me feel hugely self conscious.
Dating sites while useful for seeing that yes there are attractive girls with which, on paper, I should get on with like a house on fire. They are am sure bombarded with messages from suitors on a daily basis and while I feel that what I write, when I send them a message, accurately reflects who I am. I'm sure it's as unique to them as a piece of gravel on a driveway. The solution, so guys are told by other guys (which is always the primary source of knowledge on these things, rightly or wrongly) is to stand out, be slightly obnoxious, as the girl won't be expecting that. "It works!" so they claim "sure fire, tried and trusted method!" they always sound like snake oil salesmen from the 1850s. This maybe true, you may get a girl to think "wait, he's not showering me with complements, that makes me want to go out with him to find out more" The thing is with this is it makes guys like me disillusioned with the dating process.
I'm not a complete hermit. As I said, I'm just not an active dater. I'll strike up a conversation with any girls in my immediate vicinity when out and about or going to parties. And if they're not interested or we've nothing in common then that's ok it's not my primary purpose for being there. Alas, if only all this was much simpler.
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